I’m sitting in Houston, Tx at a family reunion, and I’ve had some incredible moments again with my kids. (Ok, and actually…I am laying next to my daughter in my parent’s RV just chomping at the bit to write a blog post.) The more time I spend with my kids, I am more than certain that it is they who are teaching me just as much about life as I am teaching them. It’s a two way street. And, that is an incredible thought pattern responsible for this blog post about double vision.
I have spent the past few days thinking about my kiddos, and I’m willing to share a few of my thoughts: (and notice how each below is in pairs/doubles…cool, huh?!)
1. They are my kiddos.
2. They are not just my kiddos or children that have come to me through my bloodline or biological magic. They are God’s children (as am I), and they have been entrusted to me by the Creator of the Universe to raise. This is nothing short of an honor and privilege regardless of how they became entrusted to me.
1. I expect respect from my kids.
2. I show love and respect to my kids as their elder just the same as I expect it.
1. I desire time with my kids and attention from them.
2. My kiddos (even my teens) desire and crave attention with me, too.
1. I discipline my kids through teaching and not through yelling, threats, or control.
2. My kids learn from me the same way I learn from God, The Father.
1. I am always cleaning up after my kids, because they constantly make a mess of some thing!
2. God is always cleaning up after me, because I am always screwing some thing up and asking for His help to clean up the messes I’ve made.
1. The best way to teach my children anything is to model the behavior through elimination, moderation, or addition. (This means eliminating bad/unwanted/unhealthy behaviors, knowing and modeling self control and moderation, and adding behaviors that are beneficial for life change and self improvement.)
2. The best way to learn some things is by watching your children and then modeling them. They are inquisitive, playful, and purposeful. I have never watched a kid play half heartedly, because they are too busy creating a purpose for their play.
I could go on and on. Tonight I was on my way to bed, but I decided to sit and chat with my son under the stars, since he wasn’t quite ready to head to bed yet. We took my laptop and tried to pull up a map of the stars and constellations to pin point the stars. However, I am just not that talented at direction, so we ended up having a few good laughs and a lot of great conversation.
After more than an hour of just talking and giggling with my teenager, I was heading to bed when I thought about double vision. I think we tend to think of our children from an “ownership” perspective, when in reality they are God’s children and we are raising them for His purpose! Does that thought not just blow your mind? While I may want and hope they go to this college or that college, I find myself ultimately remembering that I am raising them to become part of God’s great plan. And when I find myself viewing them as children of God, entrusted to me, I find myself wanting to learn more about how Jesus:
Spoke to people.
Humbled himself to other people.
I don’t want to follow how my parents did things to raise me and how the world taught me to raise my kiddos. And I mean no disrespect in that at all, because my parents did a fine job which I commend them for. But, when I really think about the type of parent I want to be, it has more to do with who Jesus was, how he acted towards people and children, and I find myself wanting to model my parenting style toward His teaching style.
Some days I see my kids as exhausting or not learning and making necessary decisions quickly enough. And then I have to take into consideration that there is another way to look at the situations and my children. That second vision shows me how to view it from Jesus’ standpoint. And that makes my vision double. It’s no longer just my vision. But, instead a blended vision of what I see and how Christ would view and react/teach various things to The Father’s children.
The more I view my children from His perspective and see how much He has entrusted to me, the less I focus on my perspective alone. The more I see people in general from this perspective the more my relationships grow and flourish. And the more they grow and flourish, the more I get to enjoy them. This is one benefit I plan on keeping, because I want all of my relationships to be grounded in Christ. And in order to grow them, I must keep seeing beyond my own eyes and learn to see more through His.